In the New Year, may you discover that your home is built to withstand floods, ice storms, earthquakes and escalating insurance rates.

May it be free of mould, mildew and mice, and safe from termites and family fights.

If you have trouble hearing, may you get a hearing aid (as I did). If you have trouble seeing, may you get respectable spectacles. If you cannot drive, may you cultivate friends who do. If you cannot smell, may you take frequent showers.

May your cardiologist hear no murmur, your dentist see no cavity, your dermatologist see no lesion, your ophthalmologist see no cataract, and your proctologist tell you, “You look marvelous!”

May your computer not freeze, your car not overheat, your food disposal not clog up, your refrigerator not melt down, your pipes not spring a leak, your air conditioner not quit and your neighbour’s roaring leaf-blower break down.

May you be able to decipher your cable TV and credit card bills, your tax and insurance forms, and the extra-fine print at the bottom of everything stating they did not really mean what is written above.

May you solve the mystery of getting from here to there despite Toronto traffic, and without having to declare bankruptcy at the gasoline pump.

May your children take a liking to you, your grandchildren call you even when they don’t want money, and your great-grandchildren teach you how to send a text message.

May those who seek asylum find refuge and those who seek to kill be brought to justice. May Israel remain secure and Israelis learn to respect one another. May all seven billion people in the world learn that care for the planet is protection for our grandchildren. May countries in conflict learn that our survival depends on mutual respect.

And should you ever feel alone and unloved, may you know that you are never alone, for God is with you, in you, and loves you—and so do I. May Mashiah come this year, and if she does not, may you live as if he had, and may you be blessed with a healthy, meaningful and satisfying year of life.

In large measure, this benediction is adapted from one composed by Rabbi Jacob Pressman.